I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to participate in and exist as the character of ‘I Don’t Want to
Miss-Out’, where I manipulate myself with a thought/belief where a though comes
up as a picture of ‘what I’m going to miss’, where in a single moment an entire
scenario flashes in my mind and I immediately believe in that picture-thought,
and because I believe in that thought, all my actions are based on that thought
as how I perceive reality to be, in spite of the actuality of reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to believe in a picture in my mind, not realizing that it is
only a picture, and thus has no actual relevance to reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to believe in the pictures that come up in my mind to such an
extent that I immediately accept them as valid and then act according to them
as if they are real in fact.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to not realize that I am actually just reacting and living
according to pictures in my mind and not actual reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to when seeing the picture in my mind of me participating in a scenario
and ‘having such a good/amazing time’ to immediately believe that this picture
will be the reality I will experience.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to when seeing the picture in my mind of me being disappointed that
I did not ‘act on an opportunity to do something awesome’ and ‘have an awesome
experience’, to immediately believe this picture is valid.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to not see/realize/understand how I manipulated myself with
pictures in my mind, by utilizing pictures of scenarios/situations that I have
defined as positive/negative in order to manipulate myself to take certain
action/make certain choices based on fear of loss, wherein I fear that I am
going to ‘lose’ what the positive picture is showing me as having a
‘good/exciting experience’ as the negative picture shows where I am
‘disappointed for ‘missing-out’ on the positive experience I ‘could have had’.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to participate in backchat/internal conversations within this
not realizing that I was utilizing conversation with myself in my mind to
manipulate myself and my very behavior as how I live and act and interact with
others in my world and reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to participate in the backchat of ‘maybe I should go, as I don’t
want to miss out’, within this reaffirming the perception/belief that I would
be ‘missing-out’ on something, within this, feeling like I will actually lose a
part of myself as if an experience would have made me who I am, and thus I
forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself
according to the experiences I have/had, when who I am is here as life which is
not and not determined by or limited to a certain set of experiences to define
it, as all experience is here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to participate in the backchat of ‘I bet it’s going to be really
fun’ within this trying to convince and talk myself into a certain course of
action/behavior while ignoring the obvious fact that I don’t/can’t actually
know what it’s going to be like/how I’ll actually experience myself, unless I
am actually creating how I will experience myself, as then I’ll know that I will
convince myself and make myself feel like I am having a good time and an
exciting experience, despite the reality of the experience, so that I will feel
justified in my thoughts and backchat, and so that I’ll never realize how I
deceived and manipulated myself so that I may remain a slave to my thoughts
forever.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to go into emotion/feeling reactions of nervousness/anxiety in
reaction to the fear of ‘missing-out’, within this I forgive myself that I have
accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I was creating these
emotions/feelings within myself by creating friction towards this point of ‘Do
I want to go or Don’t I? Should or shouldn’t I?, within this pulling myself
back-and-forth between two polarity points, literally playing a game with
myself at the expense of my human physical body generating these
feelings/emotions of anxiety/deparation/nervousness/fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to not see that the physical feelings I’d feel in my body
were/are indicating to me what I am/was participating in and the consequences
of such participation in thoughts as self manipulation and separation, wherein
I’d experience feelings such as an anxiety and rush of adrenaline in accordance
with the backchat of ‘I’ve got to make a move now before it’s too late and I miss the opportunity’ where I actually induce a state of
‘rushing’ within my human physical body.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to wreak havoc on my physical human body by participating in the
thoughts/feelings/emotions associated with this character, and to ignore the
stress I put on my human physical body within the obvious signs of what I
actually feel within my body as I participate in this character, as tension in
the shoulders/upper body, jitteriness, tiredness, adrenaline rush, even nausea,
all indicating to me the abuse I am accepting and allowing as consequence in
participating in and existing as the character of ‘I Don’t want to Miss-Out’.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and
allowed myself to not realize that in participating in and living as the
character of ‘I Don’t want to Miss-Out’, that I am actually already
missing-out, as I am busy in my mind in thoughts/backchat/feelings/emotions and
thus I am anywhere but here actually living, and thus missing-out on life by
being within my mind.
