Showing posts with label fight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fight. Show all posts
Day 208: Self Forgiveness for Making Enemies
Here I am continuing from the previous post, here. I'll now walk the Self Forgiveness for how I'd accepted the justifications for war and separation from other human beings. For context, here is where I left off in the last post discussing this point:
Within all this, I eventually accepted the justifications myself, that apparently we have enemies and thus must fight them and we’re ‘protecting’ ourselves. I was so sold on the idea that apparently there were these vicious enemies out there who were big and posed some sort of real threat to us and so we just had to protect ourselves. Yet, I had no idea actually how big any of these countries were, or how developed they are, and probably most importantly why do they apparently want to attack us? I mean, for me to want to attack someone, it took a reason. I had to believe that they were a threat to me or harmed me in some way. So, wouldn’t that hold true for the supposed ‘enemies’ as well? I mean, I knew they are people, human beings, just like me. Same bodies with superficial differences, and you’ve got moms and dads and children, etc. They all need the same things as me like food, water, shelter, education. Sure we have some cultural differences, though those are usually blown out of proportion by the media, in order to highlight our apparent differences, to feed the idea and misperception that there could be human beings out there that are ‘just different’ and just want to harm us for no good reason, and so we won’t ever realize that nobody just wants to hurt others, and we’ll never investigate or question to get to the bottom of what is really going on, as such behavior is always the symptom of something out of ordinary going on.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept any justification for having enemies, and having to 'fight our enemies' when in fact this has never been a solution but has only kept us locked in relationships of being 'enemies' toward others and fighting each other with no end in sight.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not question why we would have enemies, and therefore to not ever investigate the situation to get the full story of what was going on, in order to understand the situation to be able to find actual solutions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept the idea/perception of having 'enemies' because it was presented to me as being 'fact' and 'the way things are' and presented with all sorts of justifications that if I had but questioned I may have realized that the relationship of 'being enemies' does not just happen or exist within itself but is the result of specific reasons and causes namely our own behavior toward one another, which if we changed would then stop creating ourselves as enemies.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that if we stop living the relationships of separation we have formed toward others, that no such separation would exist, and no one would be enemies but we would all get along and coexist and work together and for once be able to explore our true potential as humanity.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that most, if not all, of our problems are the result of us living in separation toward one another, and that this would imply that we are the very solution we have been waiting for, right under our noses this whole time, since we are the cause of the problem.
I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that any point within myself where I am living in separation of another being is the same point which is responsible for all the wars and atrocities that exist that we allow to happen to one another and that we act out on one another.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that holding onto the points of separation I exist as toward others is in some way serving me, when it is in fact doing the opposite, by keeping myself, my relationships and this whole world in a state of perpetual fighting and conflict, where we can never get to know what it would be like to really live and express ourselves here, instead of being caught up in endless conflict.
When and as I see myself participating in conflict and separation within myself toward another/others, I stop and breathe, remind myself that no one is actually my enemy, and reassess the situation within the consideration of all involved equally as myself.
I realize that I am responsible for the war and conflict in the world if I allow conflict to exist in me toward others and that when I take the approach of needing to defend or protect myself from another where I am only considering what is best for me that I am immediately placing myself in a position of opposition toward them, and actually placing the other in a position of having to defend themselves against me as well, since I am only considering my own interest, and thus by such behavior we drive each other apart and into conflict.
I realize that as long as I am stuck in a position of conflict toward another, that I actually prevent myself from seeing any effective solution, because that requires to be considering all points equally, otherwise it will simply lead to more conflict.
I commit myself to identifying and clearing up any points of separation within myself so that I can see the solutions that would be lasting and which would prevent and thus end conflict.
Day 96: The ‘My Way’ Character – Part 2
So, what takes place within the Imagination when we’re participating in/as this character? Well, since we’ve decided we want/desire/need things to go a certain way/‘my way’, and the fear has come up suddenly that we’re maybe not going to get ‘my way’, we’ll then imagine ‘what might/could/would happen’ if we don’t get ‘my way’, where we’ll then cycle through our imagination all the beliefs and fears and projections that we believe are going to happen reality doesn’t go just the way we wanted it to. Through this, we are just ‘feeding the fire’ of this character, and furthering our own possession into/as this character, to the point where we become it so completely, that it’s all we think/say/speak/act/react as.
For example, in a recent situation where I was working on practicing some lines from a script with another person, I had an idea of how I wanted to do it, and when they suggested we do it another way, the ‘My Way’ character was activated, as I feared that I would not get ‘My Way’, which I had formed the belief/perception that I needed/required/wanted the practice session to go a certain way, and within this actually totally closed myself off to hearing or even considering any other way it might be done, nor considering how it might be best for the other person as well. And within this, going into a character as reaction to a fear, instead of remaining here as myself and simply discussing the point and how best to proceed, without pre-formed expectations and beliefs, to see what works best for all in the situation, and then simply walk that.
So, by going into the ‘My Way’ character here, we can see that the consequence was closing myself off to consideration of what would actually be best for All in the moment, and instead becoming possessed by a character wherein I wanted to hold onto an idea of ‘my way’ as how I believed/perceived that I wanted/needed things to go, wherein I’m actually only considering myself, which creates a situation of conflict, as I’m separating my interest from the interest of the whole.
And within this, not even considering the actual practicality of how I want to do things/how I want reality to go, as to whether or not my want is actually practical and would actually be best. And it’s obviously not best, since I’m considering my interest in separation of the whole rest of existence, which I exist within where my life is only as good as the quality of this existence/reality is, and thus my interest is the same and not separate from the interest of all of reality/existence. Therefore, any interest that’s not considering the whole, is not going to lead to the best life possible, and thus is not actually in my interest. So you can see that self interest which is separate from/doesn’t consider the interest of the whole equally, is not a benefit to self as an individual.
Now, onto the Physical and Reaction Dimension of the My Way character. What I’ll experience is like an all-over body stiffens, like my body freeze for a moment, while caught up in the mind reaction of where the mind is slowly realizing that reality is going according to another way than expected, and the mind needs a moment to try and figure out what to do, how to defend itself/protect its interest, in this situation where it perceives a threat. There will also be some adrenaline, which is like an excitement experience for the mind from being in a position where you don’t know what’s going to happen and fear some consequence.
In the following post we’ll get into Self Forgiveness Statements on all the Dimensions to assist and support ourselves to release ourselves from and stop living as the My Way character.
Related articles
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Day 131: DESTENI Character - Self-Forgiveness / Commitments (Part1)
Day 55: Giving Equal Value
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