Day 231: The Ick Factor that Prevents Self Movement

For this post I'd like to bring through a very important point that came up in discussion after a recent google hangout, which you can watch here: Revolutionizing Social Reintegration. The point was briefly touched on within the hangout, but I want to now go a bit deeper into it, because we noticed that it is really a crucial point that can kind of be overlooked, not only in regard to the topic of the hangout which centered on the prison problem in the U.S., but really relates to any of the problems that we face in the world today.

What I noticed was that when I decided to go deeper into the prison problem and take the time to do research and consider solutions, was that in the moment that the consideration came up to do so, there was initially this kind of resistance, like, 'ehhh, I don't really want to go there' was the essence of the sentiment. What I realized from this is that we tend to see such things as 'unpleasant' and something we'd rather not get involved with, like it's 'too messy' or 'heavy' a problem that it would rather be avoided. But, is that really the case?

I mean, it's easy to look at problems from a distance, and see that things really need to be fixed and that we really need to implement solutions. It's easy to agree to that. But when it comes to really getting into the nitty-gritty, it just seems like it's too little, too slow, not enough impact. Because the mind wants instant gratification. It's easy to see the 'overall' solution for things. Like if you were to consider not just looking at solutions in general to the prison problem, but for example actually working with individuals released from prison, creating programs to assist them to transition back into society, or even just really researching the issue, putting in the time and effort to find materials to read about it, watch videos about it, maybe even write about it, getting to know the actual details of the situation, the history of it, and so on, the mind balks, like it would just be so slow, too tedious, with such a minimal effect.

Who wants to step into that issue with the poverty, the racism, the tension of a tense situation, the reality of people being put through extreme conditions, and individuals shaped by the undignified conditions that we've allowed to exist as a society and who have never really known or learned or experienced what it's like to have a dignified life because they have never had access to it.

What I found with that initial resistance that came up toward going deeper into a point that we tend to see as 'unpleasant', is that that 'unpleasantness' isn't really real. That sinking feeling of, 'gosh, who wants to deal with that' is really just my own perception or projection where I am seeing that thing as negative/undesirable/unpleasant, but in reality it's more like the opposite is the case because those things that we tend to resist, often would be the most rewarding. I mean, why wouldn't you want to be a part of bringing forth solutions in this world? Most individuals out there really want something better and would be unimaginably grateful to have an opportunity to improve their life. Isn't that what we've really all been waiting for? To be able to really find solutions to the problems we face, and bring them into fruition? But it's like we've accepted the idea of this world as 'tainted', 'icky', and we'd much rather just find a new planet to possibly live on so we wouldn't have to actually deal with the whole mess we have here!

Well look, if we can't sort out our mess we've created here, we're just going to create it wherever else we'd go, so in that respect, we don't really have a choice but to sort out what we've got going on here. And we actually have here as this physical reality, is actually a really amazing foundation for living on and exploring what life really means. The problem is not with the world itself, but with the mess we created on top of it. So it's time we got around to actually doing something about it.

So I challenge you, to challenge that voice inside yourself that would tell you 'you don't want to' for whatever reason, because it is precisely that voice that keeps us from moving in this world to do what needs to be done, to fix what we have created. And which would keep us from doing things that would actually be, dare I say, truly rewarding. Certainly it won't be easy and it won't be all rosy and wonderful all the time. But what it comes down to is what are we doing here? Is it really better to keep your head in the sand, and ignore reality while the problems just get worse and have increasingly more impact in our lives? Or would the real satisfaction be in working toward solutions, instead of accepting the way things are, thinking it's just 'too messy' to deal with?

So when you see something that you could do to expand yourself or your reality and that resistance comes up, don't just immediately accept it, have a look and question it because, it may just be turning you away from something that could actually be really rewarding that you would ultimately truly enjoy.

Related articles

• Day 640: Self Control & Temptation
• Energetic Coup D'Etat - Day 589
• When enough is just not enough - Day 495
• Embarrassment: Is it Really so Bad? - Atlanteans - Part 107

Day 60: The 'I Don't Like Conflict' Character

Today I overheard two partners having a discussion, and I saw within myself that by the tonalities of their voices and the phrasing of the statements made, I defined this as a ‘conflict’, and I saw within myself the thought come up that 'I don’t like conflict’ within a relationship, I don’t like to be in a situation of conflict with my partner, but what it is that I actually don’t like or want to avoid, is how I experience myself in such a situation where I perceive there is a ‘conflict’. And thus, there isn’t actually even a conflict, but only a perception of conflict, as it is me that is living ‘conflict’ as myself, within how I’ve defined a certain situation, wherein I feel like I am being attacked/not considered, within this projecting onto another that they are not considering me, while I then do the same thing, because ‘if they are not considering me, then I must consider myself’ and within this I am thus only considering myself, and not considering them as well, as I’ve gone into a reaction of defense. Where defense is actually where one separate oneself from another. 

Thus perhaps one’s partner may be perceiving and living the same thing in the same moment, but that doesn’t matter because it still does not make it real, it only shows how we act to keep each other within the same patterns of perception/reaction/behavior by participating in and accepting as normal the very same patterns of behavior, and it still only exists as a perception and a pattern of behavior that we live according to our perception of a situation and the relationship that we’ve formed to being in such a situation, that we’ve defined as ‘conflict’, as certain tonalities, body movements/mannerisms, certain phrasings/statements, events, behaviors, language. 

And it is up to me to not live as this pattern reaction to situations of conflict, as if I wait for another to change, then it may never happen, it doesn’t matter if another is living it as well, that has nothing to do with me stopping myself, and what does it imply if who I am is dependent on who others are and what others live as? That I actually do not then exist, as my behavior is simply the copy/clone of those I see around me in my world/reality. And what is the consequence that I allow to manifest if/when I allow my behavior to be determined by other’s behavior? That no one ever change, as we’ll all simply keep mirroring each other, and thus none of us actually exist, as we’re all just mirroring each other’s patterns of behavior, as the particular characters we’re living as. As long as I am living it, I am living the example and validating such behavior for others as well, and thus until I change the example I am living, I am only supporting others to stay the same, supporting them to accept the same pattern of behavior as who they are and as how to live and to not see/consider/realize/apply another way.

Thus, I commit myself to investigate myself and the reaction/relationship I have toward ‘conflict’, to see/understand/realize how it is that I live ‘conflict’ and actually create and manifest ‘conflict’, when there in fact is none. 

What’s cool about observing this moment where others were interacting, and seeing this relationship within myself, is that here I have an opportunity to see what relationships exist within me, so that I can look at how I would react if/when this situation were to come up, before it comes up, and see the consequence I would manifest according to how I would react in such situation, and thus giving me an opportunity to place a correction that I would rather walk if/when I find myself in such a situation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form a relationship toward ‘conflict’, wherein I have programmed myself to react a certain way toward conflict which I experience as a ‘negative’ or ‘unpleasant’ experience, and then seek to avoid conflict as I am really trying/attempting to avoid how I experience myself in such situation.

Thus, I commit myself to investigating and uncovering my relationship toward ‘conflict’, so that I can understand how I create conflict as myself, within this realizing that the character I have formed toward ‘conflict’ as the ‘I don’t like conflict and thus want to avoid conflict’ character is really me avoiding how I experience myself within/toward conflict according to the relationship that I formed toward situations I perceive as ‘conflict’. 

I commit myself to realizing that I create the experience of conflict within myself, as the ‘I am now in a situation of conflict’ character and then the ‘I must defend myself’ character as but one of the characters I’ve formed in reaction to conflict, as a way of trying/attempting to avoid/cope with how I experience myself within ‘conflict’.

I realize that the conflict that exist in the world, we create through living it as ourselves into reality, and that we are really only defending ourselves from ourselves, as we are all the same substance here, equal in form and need, and if we had formed this world from the starting point of considering all life equal and what is best for all life, the conflict would not exist. 

I commit myself to doing whatever it takes to stop manifesting a world of conflict, within firstly investigating where/how I live as and manifest the conflict in this world, to stand as an example to all in that it is possible to live another way without creating unnecessary conflict, and within this I commit myself to doing what I can to participate in the creation and implementation of an Equal Money System, to end the current conflict based Capitalist system, which creates conflict by placing us within a situation where not all are provided for and thus conflict between individuals in created, when it is totally unnecessary, as we live in a world of plenty where all can be provided for without conflict, and that would obviously be the best world to live in, for myself and the children to come.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that by living as the character of ‘I don’t like conflicts, I must avoid them’ and then trying to act in ways to avoid conflict, that I sabotage my relationships, wherein I will then hold back and not say certain things that I fear will cause conflict, and thus will accept and allow abuse within relationships simply to avoid conflict, which will eventually cause the relationship to fail, while allowing an abusive situation for both beings involved.

I commit myself stop living as the ‘desire to avoid conflict’ character, within the realization of the consequence I create by attempting/trying to avoid conflict, and thus I commit myself to find every way that I act to avoid conflict, and every character I form and participate in in order to avoid/cope with ‘conflict’, so that I can stop living as a character and rather live as a real being that does not compromise life, but supports life.