Humanity's Journey to Life: self transformation

Showing posts with label self transformation. Show all posts

Day 103: No More WAITING – Self Commitment Statements

Featured Artwork by Sylvie Jacobs

I commit myself to investigate myself and root out all patterns I exist as where I am waiting for my external environment to change before I will change, where I have made myself and who I am subject to outside factors that are separate from me, so that I can take back my response ability from where I have ‘given it away’ to places/people/situations/events, and become the directive principle of myself.

I commit myself to root out any reason/justification/excuse as to why I ‘can’t change’, why I apparently have no choice but to continue experiencing/validating/living as the reaction I am having toward something/someone else in my world/reality, and that I apparently have to feel/think/act that way because of the situation/person/event/scenario that I am reacting to.

I commit myself to becoming the directive principle of myself so that I am no longer living as a victim stance toward my environment/reality where I am literally at the whim of my outer environment where how I experience myself is determined by what is happening/present in my world/reality, to no longer be tossed about like a ragdoll from one emotion/feeling/reaction to the next, all taking a toll on my physical body, which will eventually lead to further consequence as my physical is more and more depleted by participating in these patterns.

I commit myself to realizing and remembering that since I am the creator of the patterns I exist as, because I have given permission to these patterns and I choose to participate in them, then I am the one who that must stop them, regardless of what is taking place in reality, as it is not my reality that created the patterns of reaction within me, and thus as long as I blame what is going on outside of me for my experience, then I will always be subject to my experience, and not a real being in fact that stands constant and the same no matter what in any given situation.

I commit myself to realizing the consequence of believing that it is things outside of me that is responsible for how I experience myself within myself as thoughts/feelings/emotions/backchat/reactions is trapping myself into a position where I can never change, because I’ll always be subject to my environment and thus will only always ever be just ‘along for the ride’ and thus will be ‘taken for a ride’, and not really living a real life where I am in the driver’s seat and can steer myself according to the principle of what is best for all.

I commit myself to realize that the patterns I learned to live as a child of waiting to be told what to do, if I’ve done good, if there’s something wrong with me, etc., are no longer relevant, and that I have taken on these patterns into my own mind, and am living them out myself without a parent or other authority figure actually doing so as I have become those authorities figures policing myself from within my own mind.

I commit myself to stop waiting and to change myself by no longer participating in the beliefs and patterns I formed when I was a child, and to stop being dependent on my reality to determine who/how I am, thus no longer Waiting for Change, but standing up within/as myself to Be/Become that change, as the only way I can really change is if I change myself.

I commit myself to No Longer Wait, within uncovering every way in which I Wait to Change, in blaming my environment/world/situations/events/people and using them as a reason why I can’t change, why I apparently can’t stop blaming someone for something, can’t stop feeling mad at someone for something, can’t stop a reaction of being sad toward something, can’t stop a reaction of resistance toward doing something, and thus I commit myself to in specificity walk myself out of Waiting and into Self Directive Application where I stop being a victim of the Forces that come up within me, and Become the Force of Change within/as Myself.

Day 100: The Key to Self Transformation is Walking The Decision

Featured Artwork by Jeanne Kenny

It’s Day 100 in my 7 Year Journey to Life, so in this blog I’m going to talk about The Decision that I am walking, every day, for the next seven years, or more, as long as it takes, to walk myself out of being a being that is based on self interest, and into a being that stands for what is best for All Life. The reason I do this is simple, because I have realized the world is the reflection of who we are, as each and every individual, collectively, where I am one of those individuals that makes up the whole, and thus I am responsible for how I live and what I create in this world through my words & deeds. That when I look at my life, I can see how I’ve lived a life of self interest, where all I thought/cared about was myself and those close to me, and disregarded all else, while focusing on my own personal enjoyment, within the justifications that I can’t possibly have any effect/impact on the world, so I may as well try to enjoy myself as much as I can.

What I didn’t realize, was that I was actually sabotaging myself completely, by accepting a limited existence of working my whole life so I can pay to live and spend whatever’s left on whatever entertainment that is made available to me through the system of consumerism that I could afford. I hadn’t realized that within disregarding the world and accepting it the way it is, was the reflection of and the result of disregarding myself and accepting myself the way I was. And so, also how we as humanity as a whole have created the world the way it is, by accepting the same patterns of limitation and disregard toward ourselves, which becomes our relationship to the world at large as well.

The reason I sought out entertainment was to distract myself from my disappointment with the world and my life, which I felt I couldn’t change, but I never considered that I was the actual cause of my disappointment, because I was accepting the world and my life the way it was, and not attempting to do anything about it, not taking one single action toward any kind of solution. I didn’t realize that my disappointment was simply because of the patterns and behaviors I’d come to exist as, which weren’t supportive to me and the world as a whole. I didn’t understand how it was that I had even become the way I was, because it happened so gradually, over years of time.

I didn’t realize that it was all just a matter of one simple Decision that I had made, and then lived. I had made the decision within myself to accept myself and my reality the way it was, and then I walked and lived that decision in every moment until it became who I was, because I’d lived that decision consistently until it became habit. Thus I didn’t realize the simple solution. I didn’t realize that all it would take is to take the Decision that I made to accept things and myself as the way they are, and reverse it into the Decision to change, and then simply walk that decision, in every moment, until I become it in living reality.

The point of how simply making the decision and then walking it, is really all it takes, because it doesn’t matter the patterns that come up as you walk, that had become programmed into you throughout your life, because it’s who you are within it that will determine whether you change or not. The patterns are already here within you within your very being, as it’s what/how you lived for your whole life, and so they are not going to go away in a flash, you have to consistently, breath by breath, walk the decision and stand as the realization that such patterns are not who you are, and walk in the self trust that you will no longer accept yourself as these patterns, and thus no matter what comes up, you will keep walking, and every breath in which you make the decision to keep walking, is another step you take toward self freedom, self change, self transformation, as change that is real and lasting will only come through consistent application over time, as that is exactly how you programmed the behaviors and patterns that you’ve been living as, into your being in the first place, by consistent application and living of certain behaviors and patterns, thus it will take no less to correct those patterns that one live as into principles that are best for all and best for self.

And thus, that is what I am doing here within my 7 Year Journey to Life – 7 Years, because that is approximately the time span in which we as children become programmed with most of the behaviors and patterns that we will live out through our entire adult life, like a broken record, unless we actually move ourself to stop the record, stop living as our past repeating over and over, and move ourself to change, by simply making the decision to, and living it. If you are tired of the world the way it is, and of living a life of limitation, repeating the same patterns over and over, without having any real impact in this world, I invite you to join myself and the hundreds of others who are also walking their Journeys to Life, to start your own process of Self Transformation, so that we as humanity can discover what we’re truly capable of, as individuals, and together as a Whole.

Day 91: No More Disappointment – Commitment Statements

I commit myself to realize that the Disappointment character is a character that I created within me which utilize the resources of my human physical body and turn it into energy that I then experience, and where the creation of that energy depletes and diminishes my human physical body, and thus to participate in any character is to do harm to my physical human body, and thus why I commit myself to investigating myself from top to bottom til I root-out each and every character I’ve existed as, so that I can stop the participation in characters and live here as myself as the physical, constant and stable, and not depleting and harming myself through participation in energetic experiences which is not really living.

I commit myself to realizing that I am the cause/creator of the experience of disappointment, and thus when I experience disappointment, to realize that I am creating it, and thus that I am the solution to it, and that I must simply reverse the decision to participate in this character, into the decision not to, within the realization that when I choose to participate in this character that I am enslaving myself to an experience of energy and not allowing myself to be free from energetic experiences to really live and express myself as who I really am here as the breath, as the physical, not thoughts/emotions/feelings which are just energetic experiences depleting the physical resources of my body and causing it to deteriorate, so when I participate in energetic experiences I am actually busy killing myself slowly but surely to where I will eventually meet a gruesome end, so rather not walk that path, and thus I commit myself to realizing and reminding myself of the consequences at stake when and as I see myself participating in/about to participate in an energetic experience, to give myself the opportunity to stop, and reverse the dedication that I’ve been living to having and existing as energetic experiences and characters, into commitment to stop the mind to live as a real being here, where I am silent and dark within, where I can from that darkness and silence, truly express.

I commit myself to when and as I see myself going into/about to go into the character of Disappointment, to stop, breathe, and look at how I am disappointing myself, in where/how I have let myself down, within manifesting this experience of disappointment, so that I can see where it is that I require to stand and take self responsibility to expand and direct myself in a way that’s best for life.

I commit myself to reversing my trust that I have placed within the experience of the character of disappointment, wherein I’ve come to trust that I will go into and experience and participate in this character, and thus to instead place that same trust in that I will not participate in this character, for it is the trust that I place in that I will live as this character that ‘keeps me’ living as this character, over and over and over again and never changed, and so it is to simply take the trust I am already living, and simply now reverse it to living instead of enslavement, so that I can expand and grow to my full potential as a being that is actually present and aware and that can have an actual impact on the world/reality.

I commit myself to getting to know exactly how I’ve designed myself as the mind, piece by piece, layer by layer, so that I can take myself back from everywhere I’ve given up my self direction to my mind as how I’ve programmed myself to react to even just a single image in my mind where I become totally possessed just by accepting and believing in a single thought as if it is myself and who I am, as that is not living but walking dead, as repeating the memories of the past which are dead and gone and living the same patterns over and over, instead of living for real in each and every moment a new moment, a new breath.

I commit myself to realizing that when I go into the Disappointment character, that I’m actually placing myself as a victim to reality, because I’ve in some way ‘given up’ on myself, where instead of directing myself and my reality, I isolate and cut myself off from reality by going into the entire experience associated with the Disappointment character, as the specific backchat/internal conversations/emotion/feeling reactions that come up, thus instead of being here and fully participating in my world and reality, I am going into an experience within myself, which indicates that I have accepted to rather be in my mind that to be here, and thus I must be manifesting my own disappointment, because I’ve dis-Appointed myself as one who can actually be here and participate in reality, and thus I commit myself to investigate and identify every way in which I have dis-Appointed myself, and re-Appoint myself as the Solution, by not accepting myself to ‘leave reality’ by going into my mind, but to remain here in each and every moment and trust myself to face reality no matter what.

Day 36 – Self Transformation of Appreciation

For context listen to the interview LifeReview – Expecting Appreciation from Others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop an energetic relationship within myself of doing something to ‘get’ appreciation from others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the relationship within myself of where if/when I get ‘positive’ feedback from others as appreciation that I experience a positive experience within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like I am being rewarded when others show me appreciation for what I’ve done for them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel an actual energetic rush like a warm surge within myself when another reacts in appreciation toward what I have done for them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become dependent / addicted to getting appreciation from others, which is like being addicted to a drug which cause a certain feeling in oneself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider that this is actually manipulation of others and of myself where I manipulate others by performing certain actions in order to have them react in a certain way/the way I want, which is to react within/as appreciation, so utilizing my actions in order to manipulate them to show me appreciation, which is to actually manipulate myself to be able to experience that ‘feel good’ feeling I get when someone shows appreciation toward me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider that within this I have enslaved myself to energy, where my very actions are directed by the want/need/desire to have others react in appreciation, in order to generate this energetic experience for myself within myself, and thus I have become addicted to energy, and living only for this energy, where my actions are directed according to that which will get me this energy, and thus I am not here actually living, as myself, but have enslaved myself to energy which must be constantly and continuously generated through my participation, and thus in living to get energy to consume, I am actually consuming my own life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider that as parents we program and encourage this energetic relationship within the children within saying things like ‘I really like it when you do this for me’ and putting on ‘nice’ behaviors like smiling or giving a hug, within this encouraging and affirming this relationship to develop within the child, who will then live as this behavior throughout their life and then teach it to their children as well, so passing on the sins of the fathers, we keep ourselves trapped in cycles of enslavement to energy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider that within living as this pattern I am thus not living as myself and for myself, where what I do would not depend on what reaction another might have, and my experience of myself would not change according to other’s reactions, but I would remain stable within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider that actual satisfaction comes from living as and for myself, as real satisfaction comes from self, within living for self, and not living enslaved to seeking out energy where what I do is thus not for myself as what I’d actually like to do, but is directed for and within the desire for an energetic experience, which isn’t real or sustainable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect others to react in appreciation when I do something for them, as that is how others had generally reacted in the past when I would do something for them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider the nature of energy as polarity where when someone does not react in the expected way by showing appreciation, I then go into the opposite reaction where instead of having a positive reaction within myself, I have a negative reaction as for example disappointment, confusion, frustration.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from appreciation by trying to get it from other people instead of expressing appreciation as myself for myself.

I commit myself to realize how accepting and allowing the relationship of existing and living for other’s appreciation is self sabotage that keeps me from living as and for myself, but a slave to addiction and dependence on energy to manipulate myself to experience myself in a certain way.

I commit myself to consider what self appreciation in fact means, as being comfortable and accepting of who I am within myself and my living, where my starting point is myself and not dependent on other human beings to give me a part of myself which is already in myself I just require to live it as myself.

I commit myself to live as self appreciation for myself, and not separating myself from appreciation in trying to get it from others, which leads me to using and gearing my behavior toward manipulating others to give me the desired reaction as appreciation.

I commit myself to stopping reactions within myself toward how another reacts to what I do, within this bringing my expression back to myself so that I am expressing myself as myself, not as and for the purpose of generating energy as an energetic experience within myself, but for and as myself as that is the key to real actual satisfaction and appreciation, where I appreciate what I do and am not existing as and wasting my life away within wishing, hoping, wanting, needing, desiring, others to show appreciation.

I commit myself to within my process of self investigation and self transformation, seeing where in my life am I wanting or expecting others to appreciate me and transform that behavior and living into self appreciation, to no longer separate myself from appreciation where I am always existing in the desire for appreciation because I am not giving it to myself, but to live it as myself so that I cannot then actually ever be without it as it is a part of me as me as my expression as my living.