Day 83: The “There’s Nothing Wrong with That” Character

Now taking a look at the “There’s Nothing Wrong with That” Character, this character was developed and created in order to avoid looking at myself and investigating myself and the relationships I’m living as, because within this character the focus becomes on what another is apparently participating in as a judgment to/toward something. So the focus then becomes pointing the finger at someone else, and avoiding self investigation in the meantime.

So what happens is, in a moment where I perceive another is judging something or myself for doing/participating in something or some aspect of what I’m living as, the ‘there’s nothing wrong with that’ character becomes activated to apparently refute what the ‘other’ is apparently participating in as a judgment toward something, and within this I am not considering whether I am participating in that judgment within myself.

The fear that activates this character is the fear that I may lose whatever relationship I am holding onto and am protecting within avoiding looking at it. This character would activate so fast that I would not even realize that I was avoiding looking at something within myself, as one generally learns to avoid looking at and investigating oneself, as is obvious within the fact that no one practically has a clue to how they operate and how their mind operate, despite that they’ve been here all along and participating in their mind for practically one’s whole life.

Thus this character is just one of many that we’ve developed and that I developed within myself that functions in the process of separating ourself from ourself to avoid self responsibility by apparently not being aware of ourselves and what we’re actually deliberately participating in within ourselves.

So within the moment before this character becomes activated, the mind brings up a thought/perception/picture that something I like/want/desire is being threatened to be taken away from me, and within that fear of loss, I created this character to spring forth to the ‘rescue’, by taking the attention away from myself and placing it somewhere else, thereby ensuring that such relationship of dependency will remain within me untouched and that I will remain enslaved to the dependency relationship with the want/need/desire.

When I allow this character to take over, I experience a tension in my physical body, like my body pulls into itself and stiffens, as if preparing for an attack, and sometimes I’ll experience a rush of adrenaline and a flutter in the solar plexus. I will feel like I need to defend the point of ‘there’s nothing wrong with such-n-such’, when I am the one perceiving an attack in the first place, and I have taken something someone has said and added my own perception to it. And if that person is participating in judging something, me reacting to it as/within a character only validates the judgment, as I am participating in the same judgment within myself, as I have not investigated myself first and cleared myself of any judgments/relationships, and thus why I have reacted within/as this character.

Self Forgiveness and Commitment Statements on the “There’s Nothing Wrong with That” character to follow.

Day 81: Self Forgiveness on the “There’s Nothing Wrong with Eating Chocolate” Character

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form a relationship toward chocolate, wherein I’ve made chocolate ‘more’ than it is, by attaching a positive experience toward chocolate and the act of eating chocolate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in the event where as a child I was presented with chocolate as if it were something special and would do something special for me/to me, and within this not realizing that the positive experience I experienced within myself to/toward chocolate was my own creation and not the chocolate. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create the character of “There’s Nothing Wrong with Eating Chocolate” as a defense mechanism of the mind to not see/investigate how I am actually in fact living my relationship to chocolate, and whether I am living in/as a polarity toward chocolate within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in this character when I feared that my ability/freedom to eat chocolate was threatened, instead of realizing that what that fear was indicating was that I was holding onto a relationship toward chocolate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that to not have a relationship toward chocolate is in my best interest, not the desire for chocolate, as the desire keeps me enslaved to something in separation from myself, where I am moved by the mind as the associations I have attached to ‘chocolate’ rather than self-moving, self-directed and not wasting my life with/in habits of dependency, that have the consequence of causing harm to my physical human body, as I am feeding the desires of my mind while it is the physical that has to deal with what I put in it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself as the physical by participating in mind-based relationships toward what is here, instead of directing myself and living within common sense practicality as what is best for myself as a physical being in this reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately ignore the common sense practicality in the moment and instead of acting/living according to what is common sense here in the moment, to ‘give in’ to thoughts and backchat that come up according to the character I have formed in relation to chocolate, and live instead as the character, when that leads to consequence that could be avoided by sticking to what I see is practical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give in to excuses and justifications as backchat, as if they are valid in any way, when the purpose of backchat is always to ‘convince’ me of something in spite of what is common sense practical here in the moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to copy the behaviors of those around me and the way they acted toward/their relationship toward chocolate, and not to question why I should develop such a relationship toward chocolate, because I wanted to experience the positive experience too that others were apparently experiencing due to chocolate.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form a relationships as characters to what is here and to not realize that I did this deliberately as I had to ignore the consequence I caused/created by listening to the inner voices of backchat and allowing myself to be directed by voices in my head, instead of remaining here in actual reality.