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| Featured Artwork by Sylvie Jacobs |
I commit myself to investigate myself and root out all patterns I exist as where I am waiting for my external environment to change before I will change, where I have made myself and who I am subject to outside factors that are separate from me, so that I can take back my response ability from where I have ‘given it away’ to places/people/situations/events, and become the directive principle of myself.
I commit myself to root out any reason/justification/excuse as to why I ‘can’t change’, why I apparently have no choice but to continue experiencing/validating/living as the reaction I am having toward something/someone else in my world/reality, and that I apparently have to feel/think/act that way because of the situation/person/event/scenario that I am reacting to.
I commit myself to becoming the directive principle of myself so that I am no longer living as a victim stance toward my environment/reality where I am literally at the whim of my outer environment where how I experience myself is determined by what is happening/present in my world/reality, to no longer be tossed about like a ragdoll from one emotion/feeling/reaction to the next, all taking a toll on my physical body, which will eventually lead to further consequence as my physical is more and more depleted by participating in these patterns.
I commit myself to realizing and remembering that since I am the creator of the patterns I exist as, because I have given permission to these patterns and I choose to participate in them, then I am the one who that must stop them, regardless of what is taking place in reality, as it is not my reality that created the patterns of reaction within me, and thus as long as I blame what is going on outside of me for my experience, then I will always be subject to my experience, and not a real being in fact that stands constant and the same no matter what in any given situation.
I commit myself to realizing the consequence of believing that it is things outside of me that is responsible for how I experience myself within myself as thoughts/feelings/emotions/backchat/reactions is trapping myself into a position where I can never change, because I’ll always be subject to my environment and thus will only always ever be just ‘along for the ride’ and thus will be ‘taken for a ride’, and not really living a real life where I am in the driver’s seat and can steer myself according to the principle of what is best for all.
I commit myself to realize that the patterns I learned to live as a child of waiting to be told what to do, if I’ve done good, if there’s something wrong with me, etc., are no longer relevant, and that I have taken on these patterns into my own mind, and am living them out myself without a parent or other authority figure actually doing so as I have become those authorities figures policing myself from within my own mind.
I commit myself to stop waiting and to change myself by no longer participating in the beliefs and patterns I formed when I was a child, and to stop being dependent on my reality to determine who/how I am, thus no longer Waiting for Change, but standing up within/as myself to Be/Become that change, as the only way I can really change is if I change myself.
I commit myself to No Longer Wait, within uncovering every way in which I Wait to Change, in blaming my environment/world/situations/events/people and using them as a reason why I can’t change, why I apparently can’t stop blaming someone for something, can’t stop feeling mad at someone for something, can’t stop a reaction of being sad toward something, can’t stop a reaction of resistance toward doing something, and thus I commit myself to in specificity walk myself out of Waiting and into Self Directive Application where I stop being a victim of the Forces that come up within me, and Become the Force of Change within/as Myself.
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