Day 78: Self Forgiveness for the “I Can Do It” Character

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept and believe in the picture that comes up in my mind of me not being able to do something, and then as a response/reaction to this picture, to have created and go into the “I Can Do It” character, wherein I’m trying to convince myself that ‘I can do it’, which is only an illusion in my mind as it’s not based on actual reality that I have lived/am living as who I am here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the picture of me failing to do something is only a picture in my mind, and not actual reality, and thus when I believe in the picture I’m believing in an illusion, the consequence of which is that I then become an illusion as who I am.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that shaping myself as a picture in my mind, is not changing me as who I am in actual reality, and thus to participate and believe in the pictures I see in my mind, is a waste of time, as instead of taking action in the physical reality to actually change and expand myself, I am only busying myself with pictures in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in the moment the picture of me failing comes up, to instantly believe in it, and then to think that the only solution is by creating a character to superimpose on myself of that I ‘can do it’, and within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that what I was doing was attempting to ‘cover up’ the reality that I saw as the picture in my mind that I believed with yet another picture illusion, and thus I was staying completely within the realm of pictures, within the fantasy-land of the mind, and not actually here, never actually really dealing with myself as who I actually am and what I’m living as.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in backchat in relation to the picture that came up within my mind of me failing to do something, which I used this internal conversation to convince and talk myself into going into the character of ‘I can do it’, using backchat such as ‘oh god, what if I can’t do this’, ‘that’s just not an option’, ‘I have to do this’, ‘I must not fail at this’, within this internal conversation giving myself no other option than to pretend that ‘I can do it’, instead of seeing/realizing that the picture and belief that I am going to fail isn’t real in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not consider how this shows just how much we’re controlled by pictures within our mind, as we’ll completely allow ourselves to be directed by the pictures that come up, instantaneously believing in them as valid and real, and having complete reactionary experiences based off of them, completely removing ourself from reality, and so have we ever really been here if we’ve always been believing in and living according to the pictures in our mind?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that by changing the picture that I see in my mind that I am actually somehow changing myself and how I experience myself, and within this not realizing that if we are living as the pictures in our minds, then we are living in ignorance of our actual effect on reality in what we’re actually creating in actual reality, as we’re only busy with the pictures in our mind.

  

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I must appear to be able to do something, within this not realizing that I am living within the fear of survival and am allowing this fear to control/direct my behavior, instead of me moving myself here, in common sense consideration of the current state of reality and what actions may be best to take in a given situation, where because I am living as a reaction to this fear, I am not free to take everything into consideration, as for the moment who I am becomes this fear and the associated reactions, and that is all I can think/say/do/act within.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a positive reaction when I participate in the 'I can do it' character and then I succeed at what it is I am attempting to do, and then to take this as validation for participating in this character, because I have apparently succeeded due to living as this character, and not considering that it was the actions I took in the physical and how I applied myself in the physical that determined whether I succeeded or not, and not the character I was participating in, as the character isn't actually real, existing in substance, but is only an idea in mind, and within this, to ignore the times where I did not succeed when living as this character, so that I can believe that participating in this character is beneficial to me and continue to remain trapped  within predesigned, preprogrammed fictional characters.

Day 76: Commitment Statements on the ‘I Don’t Know What/How to Write’ Character

I commit myself to realize that the thoughts that come up in my mind as the picture of me failing to write effectively is not ever real, and thus I commit myself to stop participating in and living as the ‘I don’t know how/what to write’ character.

I commit myself to realize that when I believe in the picture illusion as real that I remove myself from reality as I’m only acting according to a ‘perception’ which is not actual reality, and thus I commit myself to recognize when I am accepting pictures/images in my mind that comes from memories/past experiences to shape my view of reality, so that I can stop believing in a picture that isn’t real, and see directly actual reality here.

I commit myself to realize that a picture is always just a picture, regardless if it ‘seems real’ or how much I believe it, a picture is a picture and not reality.

I commit myself to realize that believing in pictures is enslaving myself to my mind as I am allowing myself to be completely directed by the pictures my mind is showing me, where I allow the mind to direct me using pictures of positive/negative experiences and just like a robot can be steered according to these negative pictures/positive pictures, where I’ll seek out the picture as the experience I’ve defined as ‘positive’ and avoid the experience I’ve defined as negative, where within this there is no self directive principle as I’m not in control of myself but am enslaved to pictures.

I commit myself to realize what's going on when I participate in this character of 'not knowing how to write' is that I'm actually accepting and allowing myself to be/remain limited in ensuring that I don't take the actions that would lead me to expand myself in my ability to write, and thus I commit myself to taking the actions that lead to me expanding myself.

I commit myself to realize that the positive and negative feelings I've attached toward the picture/image thought of failing to write something, are not real and are actually self manipulation where I create positive/negative feeling experiences within myself to manipulate my behavior and to determine the choices I make, and thus I commit myself to find and identify all the positive/negative feelings I have attached to pictures/thoughts so that I can see exactly how/where I manipulate myself, and stop.

I commit myself to realize that I do not require to know how to write something before I've written it, as it requires an actual process walked in the physical of actually placing words in the physical within a structure and sequence, and thus I commit myself to 'getout of my head' as wanting to have 'prior knowledge' of how to do something, and realize that you can't 'know how to do something', you have to actually walk it in the physical, and thus if I'm always waiting to do something to first 'know' how to do it, then I will never do anything, and thus this 'wanting/needing to know' is actually a trap where I keep myself from actually doing anything and moving and walking in expansion of myself and my abilities.

I commit myself to stop abusing the physical through participation in the 'I don't know how/what to write' character, within the stress and tension that I cause within my physical body from the thoughts/emotions/feelings that I participate in as this character.

I commit myself to utilize the thoughts that come up in my mind as tools that are showing me exactly how/where I've subjugated myself to my mind, by allowing myself to be directed and manipulated by images/pictures as the thoughts that come up in my mind, so that I can stop all participation in self manipulation through participation in characters whose purpose is to generate energetic feeling experiences within myself at the expense of the physical, and rather live here as an actual real being that is not subject to pictures and preprogrammed predesigned reactions to pictures based on memories, which aren't who I really am, because life isn't a memory.

Day 73: Commitment Statements on the ‘I Don’t Want to Miss-Out’ Character

Featured Art by Anna Brix Thomsen

I commit myself to investigate myself to become aware of all the ways I exist as the ‘I Don’t Want to Miss-Out’ character, so that I can stop living as and according to a thought/belief which is not relevant to reality, so that I can remain here in reality and stop ‘Missing-Out’ on Real Life by being possessed in my mind where I trap myself by believing in the pictures my mind shows me so that I then live according to the pictures in my mind instead of reality which means I’m existing in an alternate reality in my mind, while I am actually here as the physical and thus missing out on myself and life as the physical.

I commit myself to be/become aware of what is just a picture in my mind, so that I can actually see and identify when a picture comes up in my mind and realize that it is just a picture in my mind and not actual reality, and so that within being able to identify when a picture pops up that I can see it for what it is and not immediately go into belief of that thought, which then will shape my entire perception of reality, and thus will shape who I am as I will act and live according to that perception.

I commit myself to realizing that the pictures that pop up in my mind are only pictures and are never reality.

I commit myself to realize that when a picture comes up in my mind of a scenario where I am ‘having such a good/amazing time’ to immediately realize that this is only a picture that I am attempting to manipulate my perception of reality with, and thus not participate/believe in/validate the picture.

I commit myself to when I see a picture come up in my mind of where I have ‘missed out on an opportunity to do something awesome’ and ‘have an awesome experience’, to realize that it is only a picture that I am attempting to manipulate myself with, that will control/determine my behavior, where I am trying to convince myself to take certain actions out of the fear of ‘missing out’, and thus I am living only as this fear, and not making an actual self-willed decision of what I’d like to do or what would be most effective to do.

I commit myself to investigating myself and getting to know all the ways that I manipulate myself with pictures, where I allow myself to be directed by positive and negative images that come up in my mind, so that I can stop this self-manipulation and making choices out of fear of loss, so that I can rather make the most effective decisions instead of being ruled by fear.

I commit myself to be/become aware of the internal conversations/backchat that I participate in and use to manipulate myself and how I live and interact with myself and with others, so that I can stop manipulating myself through internal conversations within the understanding of the consequences I manifest through how I create myself with the very words and sentences I allow to take place/exist within me.

I commit myself to no longer participate in the backchat of ‘maybe I should go, I don’t want to miss out on this’ within the realization that this is only a thought based on fear of loss, which indicates that I am not standing here stable as myself, but am allowing ‘who I am’ to be determined by what I do, as the experiences I have/don’t have, and thus I commit myself to really getting to know myself so that I can stand here stable as myself as ‘who I am’ decided by myself in awareness of how I create myself and this reality as the reflection of who I am.

I commit myself to no longer participate in the backchat of ‘I bet it’s going to be really fun’ and to realize that I speak this phrase within myself to mind control myself into certain courses of action/behavior, and to realize that I obviously don’t and can’t know how I am actually going to experience myself, and thus a thought is never reality, yet I’ll shape how I experience myself based on the thoughts that I believe are real.

I commit myself to be/become aware of the physical feelings I experience when participating in/as the ‘I don’t want to miss-out’ character, as the indicators that assist and support me to see/consider/realize the abuse that I cause to the physical and myself as the physical within participating in the thoughts/feelings/emotions in general and relating to this particular character, and that assist and support me to see/realize exactly when/where/how I participate in this character, so that I may realize and stop myself.

I commit myself to stop wreaking havoc on my physical body, by walking myself through investigating myself in totality to see and identify each and every way I live as this character of ‘I don’t want to miss-out’ and of all characters that I live as, so that I can stop participating in abusing myself and this reality as the consequence of participation in/as thoughts/feelings/emotions through living as characters, instead of real beings here.

I commit myself to realize that when I am participating in and living as a character that I am not actually here in reality and thus when I participate in and as the character of ‘I don’t want to miss-out’, I am actually already missing-out on myself as the real physical being here and this physical reality and instead only participating in my mind reality which isn’t real as it doesn’t exist in substance, but only as a bubble of an alternate reality which only I experience, as thoughts/feelings/emotions experienced within my human physical body as chemical reactions, and thus not actual real physical experience as life here, and thus I commit myself to stop existing as all characters so that I can exist as a real being here, not missing-out on the time I have here as a physical being before it’s too late.

                                                               

Day 70: Corrective Statements on the ‘Fear of Failure’ Character

I commit myself to stop existing as the ‘Fear of Failure’ Character.

I commit myself to realizing that it is only a thought that triggers the character of ‘fear of failure’ that comes up so immediately I do not notice it, and thus I commit myself to when this character is activated, investigate myself and become aware of what thought triggered me to go into this character, to identify the thought so that I can recognize the thought and stop becoming and living as this character.

I commit myself to realizing that thoughts are not who I am, and that if I am controlled and directed by a thought, then I am not really here as myself, and thus I commit myself to not accepting myself as a thought, so that I can be here as myself as an actual being, and not just living as a thought that isn’t real.

I commit myself to realize that the thought of me failing does not actually exist, and that the only way I can ‘know’ that I am going to fail is if I am already creating it myself, as what hasn’t happened isn’t determined yet, and thus it is me accepting the thought of failure as real that makes it real, as I’ll then live according to and as that thought/belief.

I commit myself to realizing that I am in fact responsible for creating myself as failure when I believe/accept/live as the fear of failure, and thus it is my response ability to stop creating myself as failure by no longer accepting/participating in the character of ‘fear of failure’.

I commit myself to when and as I notice I am participating in backchat, to stop participating in the backchat as it is only reaffirming my acceptance of myself as failure, and is the literal process where I talk myself into manifesting myself as failure. 

I commit myself to when I see myself participate in the backchat of ‘what is the point if I’m just going to fail’, to realize that I am participating in a self belief of myself as failure as the fear of failure character which has been activated/triggered by a thought, and that the consequence of accepting and participating in this thought will be that I will manifest myself as failure, as if I give in to this backchat, the result will be that I will avoid doing that which I believe I am certainly going to fail, within this giving up possible opportunities to expand myself within applying myself in what I do, rather than sinply accepting myself as limited and ‘unable’, without actually walking a practical process to find out what I’m actually capable of.

I commit myself to when I see myself participate in the backchat ‘Man, I don’t want to go through that’, to stop, within the realization that I am busy convincing myself to accept myself as limited utilizing a picture of ‘what it is I’ll have to go through’ which is actually me projecting what is going to happen, which isn’t actually possible as it hasn’t happened yet,  and thus if I already know what is going to happen as how I am going to experience myself, it indicates that I am living as a repeating pattern of reactions as emotion/feeling experiences and thus am not really living here as life.  

I commit myself to when I see myself participate in the backchat ‘Why do I always fail’ to stop, within the realization that I am attempting to manipulate myself with my mind to believe that I ‘always fail’ in order to create an energetic experience within myself, wherein I become that energetic experience for the moment as it takes me over as a literal possession where it is all I see/think/feel/experience, distracting myself from being here and actually applying myself effectively within my world and reality.

I commit myself to become aware through the process of self investigation and getting to know myself, of how I accept and allow myself to be and live as a mind possessed zombie through actually believing in and accepting thoughts as valid and as who I am, so that I can stop living as a zombie to my own personal mind-control that I create for myself within accepting a thought as who I am when it is only a picture in my mind and not real.

I commit myself to no longer sabotage myself by accepting the thought of failure that trigger the character of ‘fear of failure’, to no longer accept my approach to myself and my life to be one of limitation wherein I create myself as failure through my participation in thoughts and backchat, so that I can change my approach to rather seeing how I can grow/develop/expand myself to be most effective and to walk in self trust and vulnerability to explore what I am actually capable of without sabotaging myself within thoughts as projections into the future that dictate who I am and will be, trapping myself in cycles of limitation and suppression, which is not way to live.

Thus, I commit myself to live a life that is real, where I am a real actual physical being here and not controlled and directed by thoughts in my mind that take me away from reality and living what is best for life, which is to be here as a participant that lives according to the principle of doing what is best for all life, in living the example of living a life without fear that I cause myself in my own mind which I allow to suppress and trap me within pictures and memories to not ever move and apply and expand myself here.